At some point in your life you will do or not do something because either someone has told you what to do, or you are worried about what others think of you. But why? Why do we live our lives in a constant fear of embarrassment and humiliation? Life would be so much easier if we all learnt to stop caring about the opinions of others and live our lives following nothing but our own morals and opinions of ourselves.
Should you care about other people’s opinions?
The harsh truth about all this is that no one really cares about you. I don’t mean the people you’re close to, I’m talking about the people in life who you don’t know. You might find yourself wandering down the street wondering what passers by think of you and if they’re judging you or not, but they are probably thinking the exact same thing. We all like to think that people are judging us from afar, but you’re not the centre of everyone’s attention, so the chances are most passers by don’t notice you enough to remember you later that day.
Let’s say that a passer by did judge you whilst you walked past them. Maybe they didn’t like your hair or your shoes or your clothes. So what? You’re probably not going to see them again so why do you care what they think of you? There’s no point wasting time worrying about the opinions of those who you don’t even know.
You’re probably always going to care about what your close friends and family think of you, and that’s acceptable – to an extent. Don’t let their opinions affect you too much because otherwise you’ll find yourself conforming to other people’s standards rather than your own.
If we all continue to live our lives worrying about what people think of us, it’s highly likely that we won’t get half of the things done which we want to do, or we’ll waste time preparing or changing ourselves to impress others. Live your life based on who you want to be, not on who others want you to be.
How to stop caring
Some people will have the ability to wake up tomorrow and just stop giving a s***, however most people will never be able to stop caring unless they take the right steps towards it. Here are some steps you can take:
1. Cut out negative people
One of the first things you should do is remove the negative people from your life. If there are people in your life who never support you or they make negative comments all the time, then it’s time to cut them off. All they do is make you more self-conscious and this is what causes you to care about what people think of you. It’s important that you surround yourself with positive people who make you feel good about yourself, because if your self-confidence is high then you will begin to care less.
2. Think “what’s the worst that could happen?”
If you are scared about going to the gym or you have to put on some makeup just to go the shop across the road, then you need to start thinking about the worst case scenario. Let’s say you want to go to the shop but you’re not in your best clothes or you have no makeup on, what could possible happen if you decide to go? Someone might look at you funny or someone might even laugh if you’re wearing something silly, but like I said at the start; so what? Figure out the worst case scenario for your situation, and ask yourself if you can survive it. I bet you’ll be fine.
3. Be honest with yourself
Before you do anything, really ask yourself if you are doing for yourself or to please someone else. Once you start doing things for yourself instead of others, you’ll begin to accept who you are and your needs, leading to a life free of care of others opinions. Just don’t start telling yourself that what you’re doing is for yourself when you know it is for someone else. Be honest with yourself.
4. Remember that opinion is subjective
That’s right, when someone conveys their opinion it does not make it a fact, nor does it mean that you must listen to it and treat it as though it is so. Everyone has their own opinions. You may not like what someone is wearing or the way they have their hair, but you wouldn’t expect them to change because of you, so why should you change because of them?
5. Don’t be afraid of mistakes
Everyone makes mistakes. The key is to not be afraid of making them. When you learn to not be afraid of mistakes, you’ll start to become unafraid of trying all kinds of new things. Mistakes are supposed to be learnt from so you can move on, rather than holding yourself back. So don’t be afraid.
6. Realise just how short life is
Life is very short. We don’t have much time on this earth, so it’s time to stop worrying and just do the things you love them the way you love doing them.